Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Officially burnt out

supprise supprise its been 3 years at KVCC and im burnt out on school. Who saw that coming. With the semester almost over im just mailing it in. I dont pay attention in class at all. Im just there randomly in the back of class staring at the wall day dreaming away.

I must admit, i play my best basketball in blue, yellow, and black nikes. Its wearing i had a pair in grade school and i was real good, and i stole/was given a pair last year that were old and use to be my brother timmys. Ive been playing real good in them too.

Yes i am litterally convince i have died and this is my hell. Odd thing to say but im just being randomly honest. And also i should be asleep since i only got a hour of sleep last night.

My internet is being stupid and really slow right now -.-

I keep having bad night day dreams about Ella coming back and telling she is leaving me for someone else... its not that i dont trust her its that i dont trust other people near her. I mean she is perfect and all why wouldnt anyone else want her?

Yea i know im having stupid mood swings lately like a crazy person. I honestly cant help it. Its not really mood swings i think, i think im extremely depressed with a side of suprise happiness from time to time.

1st greatest dream: Marry Ella and have lil kiddies that i will teach to call there grampa smelly butt face. Just dont tell Ella i taught them that >.>

2nd greatest dream: if first one doesnt happen.... ima just drop everything and instead of jumping off building/bridge ima just leave my life and try to make it in basketball i mean thats so stupid that its like dieing. Plus you never know.

3rd greatest dream: Marry Ella and have lil kiddies that i will teach to call there grampa smelly butt face. Just dont tell Ella i taught them that >.>

I hate public speaking class. Its a class where we talk about talking.... in public....

one of my hopes in basketball is to one day play lebron. Then shove him alot everytime he gets the ball, i hope he twists his ankle.

I have a sleep deprived headache, i hate these so much...

Todays goals: sleep till 4, hopefully get my car back b4 i have to be to class. come back, grab ps3, hopefully sis left fooling around money for me and nephews, rent NBA 2k10, fool around with it lol. Im really not up to another hardcore game of 21 >.< though i know javy wants to beat me bad right now. Then sleep some more. then play around some more then tell my sis we did flash cards while running laps rofl.

I wonder if somethings arent ment to be. I miss my F you life ima do wat i want attitude... Goddddd i miss being me, i miss being around her. Im not the same without her. I need her so bad.... i miss her so much.... anything i have you can have, soul included, if you can get me next to her. minimum ten seconds. Thats a promise.

Ok on that depressing note ima take my nap so i dont go crazy tonight.

1 comment:

  1. Sorry, I doubt I could get you to there I can barely afford a bus trip to Waterford. And whose dad do you want your kids to call smelly butt face? Her dad? And the whole going through motions is totally normal when your sad. Trust me on that It'll get better.